The Sun

by Alan Dewar, Shane Dewar, Mary Lou Dewar, Jeff Dewar, Bob Dewar, David Dewar, Megan Dewar and Doug Dewar

Early in the year 2020, humanity underwent the most significant transformation of all time, when Shane and Megan Dewar first set foot on the surface of the sun.

The sun was hot but not as hot as he was expecting.

Perhaps that was one of the results of universal cooling, caused by all the pollution swirling around in space.

90% of this pollution was formed from the tears of scientists and professors who had learned of the other 10%, and subsequently let out cries of "it doesn't work that way!" and "space can't be polluted!"

On the other hand recent research in the Journal of Nonsense found that the sun on which the 2 Dewars had set foot was actually a giant beach ball from Planet Gorp.

Thus the question the two intrepid spacetronauts were here to study: if good ol' Sol is actually a Beach Ball, and not a star at all, then how has it lit and heated Earthica for these last several thousand billennia?

Perhaps other stars helped light the sun.

As they pondered this predicament, the pointy nose of their spacecraft (capable of speeds approaching mach chicken) punctured the sun, releasing so much wind that all Calgary's snow blew away and winter finally ended.


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